friends - the harsh reality and stroke

I remember reading years ago that when you have an illness, friends will stick with you for approximately six weeks.  The article said, friends will stick by your side and after about six weeks they simply want you to get better. My friends have stayed with me for six years.  There are multiple levels of “stick by”.  Some friends I know are always there if I need them.  Even my best friends I don’t call because sometimes it’s just easier to do something and not worry about the support they might need to provide me.  For example, going to a movie requires a bit of an effort.  They have to think about picking me up, helping me walk up a step, carrying food, etc. In the old days I could just meet them at the theatre.  Even friends who have had a stroke don’t call because we are at different levels in our recovery.  

Some have stopped calling because I cannot participate in the same activities such as my running friends.  When you lose something that bonded you in the first place, its natural this goes away. Since I no longer work it means I have no current work friends. My work was such a big part of my lifeso this is a huge void.  However, my former work friends have been wonderful about keeping up either through my blog, email, or lunches. My family members I count as friends and they are always there for me.  My father-in-law, whom I considered a friend, recently died.  The one positive, is his legacy lives on through my Bob, who is my best friend.  This is a” lose/win” for me.  What does all this mean?  Life is about constant reinvention and evolving with friends, much like the Scout Song:  “Make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other’s gold.”