Romance

I don’t often speak about Bob and my relationship.   I tend to focus and write about his role as my caregiver.

What I crave and nag him about is romance.

After 30 years of marriage and 7 years of post-stroke it’s difficult to “conjure up” romance.

But, I digress

 Last weekend I went to New York to be with 3 of my sisters and see my niece Angela perform the lead role in the play “streetcar Named Desire, “I was anxious to see if I had the stamina to travel like this and have it be a template for future travel.  We spent 3 hours at the Guggenheim museum and visited the new 9/11 Memorial. Our first trip to the memorial was just after it happened and now I went back to see how they honored the victims.   My niece was exquisite in the role of Blanche.  I sat through her 3 hour performance thinking I believe she could be a star one day.  Learned I can do things like this and the lesson is to get out of your comfort zone if you can. 

 

Upon returning to Texas, I stopped in Houston.  As I was wheeled out to the terminal, there was a man on my left who said to the wheelchair attendant:  “I’ll give you $10 bucks so I can take that girl for a beer.  He said: “ Well, Who are you?”  “I’m her husband,” says Bob.  He surprised me and came to be with me during my two 2-hour layover in Houston that turned into a 4 hour layover.   If you travel, you know it’s almost impossible to get through security without a ticket, but Bob found a way.  Now that’s what I call romance; Not, jewelry, gifts or nice dinners but finding ways to be together.  It was a perfect end to a perfect trip.  Thank you Bob.  The picture below captures my glee upon seeing Bob.

prevision

I sometimes have to write about topics several times. At the risk of repeating myself to let the message “sink in”. This time it’s about stroke survivors needing something to look forward to. In my case it’s an upcoming trip to New York. The trip is centered on visiting my niece and attending A Street Car Named Desire, in which she has the lead role. I’m meeting three of my sisters in New Jersey. We are planning several site-seeing activities during our visit including the Guggenheim Museum, the 911 Memorial and hopefully, the Donald Judd exhibit. I find myself energized. While planning, though, I have to consider how not to be a burden being with three able-bodied adults. To that end, I am practicing walking so as not to be a burden while walking in the cold. I have to figure out how to increase my stamina and be able to do things out of my comfort zone since I’m used to staying home most days. This includes walking in different temperatures, on uneven payment, and in new territory that I may or may not be able to navigate. Being with my sisters is a great motivator since they are fun, highly intelligent, caring women. I will report after my trip with an honest assessment of my ability to travel. I also view this as a test. If I accomplish my goals, i. e. stamina and walking strong, it may mean future trips with Bob where I am not a burden, which should be the goal of anyone with a disability – standing on their own two feet (so to speak).