frustrating and humbling

At the risk of repetition, I need to reiterate that therapy never ends and ongoing therapy humbles me.  This is both good news and bad news.  The good news is I am able to attend Medicare-enabled twice a week physical therapy at St. David’s rehab to work on my walking - speed, stamina more natural gait, etc.  The bad news is the initial evaluations/tests show how bad I am doing.   For example the therapist conducted a series of tests to measure my balance.  I scored 22 out of a possible 56 points.  So I’m not looking for a sympathy vote, I truly have issues that need addressing.  I’m just excited to be able to do something about it.

What started me down the therapy path again was my friend, Tracy Netherton, and Bob’s sister, Elizabeth. I visited them in Kansas City to get a new leg brace.  I then conducted some fitting adjustments in Austin at Hanger Orthotics.  The orthotist questioned why I wasn’t using the walk-aid that I purchased from them.  Without going into too much detail, the walk-aid is to fix my foot orientation so that one day I might be able to wear regular shoes again.  I couldn’t really answer her question and she told me about a therapist at St David’s who specializes in helping patients walk with the walk-aid. So thanks to a very circuitous route, I’m now getting much needed therapy.

On a completely different note, I attended a beginning of summer party last month and I
 sat with an old colleague.  At the end of our two hour discussion, a comment about my stroke was made.  He said:  “so you had stroke?”  I was thrilled that he did not think anything was wrong with me just through our conversation.  He saw the cane but didn’t ask.  This thrilled me as well.

The two situations highlight the abnormal to normal inconsistencies that I experience daily and the steps I have to take to be normal again.

Keeping it real

When I started the blog, I vowed to make each one help stroke survivors in some way while keeping it light or humorous.  There are some realities in my life that do not allow me to always be positive.  This blog is about “keeping it real.”

This week Bob closed a really big deal. We discussed how to celebrate. Our first thought was to take a trip since Bob has worked nonstop for over 18 months to close this deal which included week nights, weekends, etc. We sat at the table this morning and discussed our options, listing activities like swim in an ocean, walking art tour on canyon road in Santa Fe or Marfa, take a long bicycle ride, hike in Big Bend, and sight-see in San Francisco.  The reality is I cannot easily do any of these things anymore.  Using the Santa Fe art tour as an example, we love the food, climate, art, etc. However, once there we would have to take my wheelchair or rent one since it is very much a walking city. This type of trip puts Bob on duty as a nonstop caregiver. So, it is not much fun for Bob to have to push me up the hilly and bumpy Canyon road all afternoon. 

We asked ourselves, what we did before the stroke.  When we traveled a trip generally centered around personal best activities such as kayaking, running, bicycling, hiking, etc.  Since I can’t do these things anymore, our trips now revolve around other stuff.  Back to our mantra:  “revel in the things you can do.”  .  By the way, I did get a new pair of blue chalcedony earrings as a result of the deal closing.  I am in the market for a new car (more on that subject later.) Now I might be able to get a better car. For now, I cannot swim in an ocean but I can swim 100 lengths in our pool at home.  I cannot walk the San Francisco hills but I can walk 1 mile in my neighborhood.  I cannot ride a bicycle outdoors but I can ride 6 miles on my recumbent bike at home.  I realized there are a lot of things I can do, I can jump on a plane and go anywhere in the world as long as someone is there on the other side to catch me “revel, revel, revel”.