Friday, September 26, 2014

friends

In the Sept 21, New York Times, David Brooks writes “Ancient writers from Aristotle to Cicero to Montaigne described friendship as the pre-eminent human institution. You can go without marriage, or justice, or honor, but friendship is indispensable to life. Each friendship, they continued, has positive social effects. Lovers face each other, but friends stand side-by-side, facing the world — often working on its behalf. Aristotle suggested that friendship is the cornerstone of society.
I took a trip last weekend on my own that ties these thoughts.  My friends invited me for a weekend on the lake, which is great closure for the summer.  While at home in Houston, I spend a lot of time alone so being with my friends helps me remember how to have real conversations, share experiences, ideas, etc.
David Brooks also writes, “Friendship helps people make better judgments. “The reason it felt do good to be with my friends from Austin again is because they know me and bob very well.  They know when   I’m not being sincere and they make me think about areas for improvement.  I really enjoy getting updated on their lives and it makes me realize how in insular I can be because I focus so much on recovery.  For example one friend shared a recent health scare with her son.  I knew nothing about this and felt instantly selfish. 
Another interesting point he wrote that “Middle-aged people have particular problems nurturing friendships and building new ones. They are so busy with work and kids that friendship gets squeezed out.” I have been friends with these women for 30 + years and I’m so thankful they stuck with me.  I’m making new friends in Houston but it is difficult so I relate to this comment.
This trip personifies my ongoing sense of normal. When I am away, I don’t focus or really even think about the stroke.  I just “be”
This blog is a tribute to my friends who have stuck with me all these years through the good and the hard times. Thank you.